You're living on the edge, surfing the digital wave, cruisin' the net frontier. You're with it!
You're in the cyber groove...an internet test pilot pushing the envelope!
BULL!
You're nothing but a net potato, a cyber slug, an evolutionary dead end, a digital dodo. You don't eat right. You never exercise. Your muscles are flab. You haven't slept well in weeks.
You know that cramp you have in the back of your neck, that tight, constant pressure that seems to power the incessant grinding of your teeth...?
THAT'S NOT SUPPOSED TO BE THERE!
Bodies aren't supposed to creak. Those puffy, bloodshot orbs that stare back at you in the mirror when you finally drag yourself out of bed... you know, the ones that look like they belong to a sixty year old boozehound...
THOSE ARE YOUR EYES!
You're killing yourself...and for what? Are you making any money? Are you advancing your career? Are you falling in love? Are you even getting laid?
NO!
SO TURN THE DAMN THING OFF!
(No, don't hit the back button...don't type in another url...stay away from that search engine...)
See that button on the CPU that turns off the power?
PUSH IT!
Didn't do it did you...
Oh well, I guess it's too late for you...
Since your deteriorating body and ravaged mind are stuck here in this artificial reality...you might as well enjoy the time you have left before hypertension blows out one of your arteries...
In the end it doesn't really matter. You're a loser in the lunch line of life...a weak link in the food chain...a corrupted file in Darwin 95.
After all, what are the chances your DNA will be passed on to future generations? You don't know anyone with a body. All your friends are in chats and newsgroups.
